I am overwhelmed and frustrated. I want the immigration process to be over, so badly. I feel like my strength to deal with all of this is just completely sapped. 

I don’t want to dig back into my old life in South Dakota to get documents proving that my husband and I are ‘legitimately’ married. 

I hate that we’re automatically suspect because we don’t have children. That that makes our marriage somehow less real. I hate that his working away from home is another strike against us, makes us look as if we don’t love each other and want to be together more than anything. 

I want to send them transcripts of our text messages, recordings of our conversations, fucking little bottles of my lonely frustrated tears, and remind them that I didn’t nuke the economy, and neither did my husband, we’re just cleaning up the fucking mess. That life in this here goddamned America isn’t a prize, it’s just the less shitty of two shitty choices that were open to us. I hate that we have to prove our intentions, that I have to pick open a lot of very fresh scabs that make me feel like an absolute and utter failure in absolutely every facet of doing life.

I hate that I know that this process would be approximately a million times more difficult if I didn’t have the immense privilege of education and whiteness that I have. 

I hate that as fuckawful as this is, it’s still a privilege that is not open to lgbtq couples. 

I feel like I’m caught in a Kafkaesque bureaucratic perpetual absurdity machine. 

  1. wendolen reblogged this from sehnsuchttraum and added:
    *hug* I wish I had more to offer — this situation sounds just terrible. :(
  2. minorearth said: *hugs* I’m sorry.
  3. futsin replied:
  4. lifeofkj replied:
  5. sakuratsukikage said: *hugs* :( Lots of lots of hugs.
  6. eyeofsithis said: *Hugs hugs hugs* :C
  7. normanee said: I’m so sorry Sehn. *hugs* If you ever need to talk, I am here!
  8. stellarvoyage said: :( *all the hugs*
  9. cocofels said: Oh Sehn, darling. This is awful, goddamn Immigration. I hope you feel better soon and really wish I could give you more than e-hugs right now. Sending both you and your husband good thoughts. :(
  10. maybethings said: /monster-size HUUUUUGS
  11. heretherebdragons reblogged this from sehnsuchttraum and added:
    [[MORE]]Oh, sweetheart. I wish this wasn’t happening to you and your beloved. And I know you WILL get through it,...
  12. sandetiger replied:
  13. kijutsushi said: *hugs* I’m sorry Sehn.
  14. douglaslovesanders said: *hugs*
  15. defira85 said: Hugs, gorgeous lady. Your strength astounds me.
  16. barbeauxbot said: that sounds so awful, bb. I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with this
  17. the-duelling-tophat said: *hugs*
  18. sehnsuchttraum posted this